Chapter 4: Pictures of You

I've been looking so long at my pictures of

you that I almost believe that they're real

I've been living so long with my pictures of you that

I almost believe that the pictures are all I can

feel.

-Pictures of You, The Cure

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Edward felt an overwhelming sense of calm when he was around her. It was as if they’d known each other forever. In his case, that was semi-true. Although he had known of her all these years, and had retained every detail of their one meeting so long ago, he knew he had a long way to go before he could say he knew her. 

He was willing to set things right. Everything.

~WtNC~

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The cold, wet nightgown was quickly discarded in favor of warm clothes. Trusting, warm, delicate hands and a soft, comforting voice eased the clothing on.

“You’ll be okay, dear. Your grandmother is on her way.”

Voices back and forth. A tall man... the doctor. He had kind eyes. Blue-green, like water. He smiled towards her from some distance as he turned again to speak to a man in a police uniform. 

The scene morphed into a blue, sterile curtain. White, cold fluorescent lights overhead. Feet dangling over the scratchy, paper-covered hospital bed.

“What happened to you?” She glanced towards the voice to find a baseball cap on the head of a boy who inched his way towards her.

“I dunno,” she felt herself say flatly. Her eyes returned to the tiled floor. “There was yelling, and water, and sirens, and darkness. I don’t like the dark.”

She sensed him come closer, until he popped up onto the edge of the bed next to her, The crinkly paper sounding loud through the room.

“I saw them bring you in. You were all wet and shaky. They said your car fell into the water. They took you out.” She heard the calming voice coming from the warm boy next to her. His arm brushed against hers, but she didn’t look up. Instead, she just whispered a simple question.

“Who are you?”

Excitement could be heard in his response. “I’m Eddie. My dad’s taking me to the Mariner’s game. I’m just waiting for him.”

“Oh.” It’s all she could say in her haze.

The boy disappeared in a mist, the cold replacing his warmth. Her mother’s desperate and fearful eyes staring at her in the darkness that suddenly surrounded her.

“Mommy?” She rose and ran towards the image of her mother, but no matter how long she ran, mommy seemed too far away to grasp.

“Baby... swim to the surface!” Her mother’s voice garbled into the depths of the black.

“Mommy!”

Bella jumped at the sound of her alarm clock. She was covered in sweat that felt disgustingly cold and made her pajamas cling to skin.

This dream was different. Unlike anything she’d ever remembered. What was that all about? She rubbed her face with her hands, fingers pushing against groggy eyes.

She could already hear voices below. Laughter and light conversation filtering through towards her room. She must’ve snoozed her alarm several times, since it was now an hour later than she intended to sleep. She made her way to the bathroom, washing away the sweat, and attempting to wash away the sadness that gripped her.

Who was that boy? She didn’t remember him at all from that night. But then again, there was very little she actually recalled. The kind doctor she remembered, but not his name.  But that boy. The baseball cap. The warmth against her skin... all foreign, and yet, somehow strangely familiar.

As she readied herself for another day, she smiled at the thought of seeing Edward again. Her disposition transformed into the happy inn-keeper once again.

~WtNC~

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A couple of days passed as all the guests settled into the routine-- in the mornings, they gathered for breakfast, sharing details of all they’d seen the day before, what their plans were for the rest of their stay, and even getting to know each other personally. It was easy conversation, easier than Bella had experienced with any other collection of guests. They were becoming friends.

Edward appeared every morning. He was a calm constant, smiling timidly when Bella caught him staring at her. She thought she should feel a little apprehensive at their quickly developing familiarity, but something inside her seemed to set her at ease with him. The other guests grew accustomed to seeing Edward, camera in-hand, snapping away at the chatty bunch.

Bella asked him why he took so many pictures of all of them when he was really there to work. He answered simply that he liked to play around with the camera and loosen up. He said it kept his outlook fresh. Little did Bella know that Edward was in fact using that excuse to capture her every expression, to memorize her in film. 

He noticed little subtleties about Bella as he took his shots. The way she blinked furiously when flustered, how she’d blow a wayward strand of hair from her forehead while she worked, or quirk a brow when teasing someone. He watched her affectionately pamper Ziggy the beagle, flipping his long ears up and down while she chatted. 

He also noticed her blush every time she caught him looking at her. He couldn’t control it. She mesmerized him—like a painting in a gallery that caught his eye, speaking to his subconscious and making him stop and stare. 

He wanted record all of these little things in case he never saw her again after he left. After he did what he came to do.

“Bella, we were wandering around the grounds a bit last night and noticed a really wonderful stone fire pit a ways down the path. Have you ever used it?” Alice asked suddenly.

“Um, yes, we’ve used it a couple of times, but not in the last few years. My Gran used to  hold barbecues down there for the guests all the time,” Bella replied as she poured Ziggy’s food into his bowl.

“Oh! Wouldn’t it be great to do that again? Jasper and I could go into town today and pick up whatever you need! Oh please! Let’s have a barbecue! The weather’s perfect!” Alice practically squealed. 

Bella hadn’t even thought about the fire pit in years, but it held very nice memories of watching her grandmother socialize with appreciative guests, their laughter and smiles filling her head at the memory. She couldn’t say no.

“Sure. That sounds like a great idea. Rose, what do you think we’d need?”

“I’ll write a few things down and then maybe I can drive you two to town?” Rose asked Alice and Jasper excitedly.

Alice clapped her hands rapidly as the conversation buzzed among the guests about everything from drinks and food to games they could play. Bella smiled to herself and chanced a glance at Edward who grinned at the spectacle as well. He caught Bella’s eyes and gave her a flirty, lopsided grin, before snapping another picture of her. She was floored by the beauty of his face, the green hue of his stare, the boldness of direct camera angle, floored her. It was silent communication, but the message was still unclear.

The day crept along nicely. Rosie took the Whitlocks to town as planned, and the other guests scheduled a whale-watching tour. Edward remained behind with Bella, and it didn’t escape her that he stayed in the main area of the house and not locked up in his room. 

Edward sat outside on the vast porch, perched comfortably in the Adirondack chair while his laptop rested on his thighs. He was looking through some of the shots he’d taken the last few days. Some of them featured the lush landscape and water. Others, the ones that really mattered to him, were pictures of her. Her shy smile as they walked through Eastsound. The way the setting sun peeked through her dark hair and surrounded her in warm orange was ethereal. 

When he heard the french doors behind him open, he quickly minimized her picture, bringing up a benign picture of trees. Yes, trees were safe. And green.

Bella tip-toed towards him and spoke quietly. She didn’t want to disturb him since it seemed he was very deep in his work.

“Hey, I’m sorry to interrupt, but I noticed it’s a little passed lunchtime and you haven’t really eaten anything, so I brought you a sandwich. I can’t guarantee it’ll be as good as Rosie’s but at least it’s something. I didn’t know what you wanted to drink, so I brought you a water bottle and beer. You can choose,” Bella explained, blushing furiously.

Edward looked up and smiled at her. She’s incredibly thoughtful... Just add that to the list of things I like about her, he thought. 

“Thanks, Bella. You’re right, I haven’t even though about food, but now that you mention it, I’m suddenly starving. You didn’t have to do this, though. I told you I don’t want to inconvenience you due to my lack of planning.”

“Oh, hush. It’s no problem at all. I was in the kitchen anyway, and saw you out here, figured I’d help. So I’ll just leave you to it. See you later.” Bella started back towards the house when Edward stopped her.

“You don’t have to leave. I’m gonna take a break to eat anyway. Sit with me.”

It was a simple request, but Bella couldn’t help her heart from stuttering at the pleading in his voice.

She sat in the chair next to him and stared out towards the harbor.

“You know, I never get tired of this view. How the afternoon moves into twilight. It’s such a perfect moment. I used to sit out here just like this when I was younger,” Bella said wistfully.

Edward glanced at her, studying her relaxed countenance. He couldn’t chance it and quickly grabbed the camera sitting next to him on the floor and snapped a few of her serene face while her eyes were closed. She realized what he was doing and laughed nervously before playfully shoving his shoulder with her hand.

“You’re insane, you know that? You have a problem. Are all photographers this obsessive about taking pictures?” she asked teasingly.

Edward chuckled and responded before he had a chance to censor himself. “Only when the subject is exceptionally interesting.” 

A moment of awkward silence filled the space between them before she broke into a disbelieving snort. “Yeah, ok, Edward.”

Edward shook his head, looking away bashfully. Well, might as well lay it on thick, Edward thought. 

“No, seriously. You have a really interesting face. Your features are... striking...” he trailed off.

“Thanks, Edward. I know what that’s code for. When guys say stuff like ‘interesting’ it usually means the same thing as when they say ‘she’s got a nice personality’,” Bella said dismissively.

Edward realized that Bella implying he didn’t think she was beautiful. He needed to rectify that situation. Now.

“Well, I don’t know what other guys might mean when they say that, but I only take pictures of things that are beautiful... to me,” Edward countered, staring into her deep brown eyes.

The revelation stunned Bella into silence. His eyes were like anchors, grounding her into that moment, and she couldn’t look away. That is, until she heard the back screen door creak open followed by the most annoying sound ever.

“Hey, hey, hey! There you are, Bella! I hope you don’t mind I let myself in.”

Mike Newton.

Edward and Bella’s moment was gone, replaced by Mike’s abrupt entrance.

Edward glared at the interloper first, wondering who the hell this guy was to intrude  at the most inopportune time. Was this the infamous Newton whose mother had tried to unsuccessfully force upon Bella? He already hated him.

“Hi, Mike,” Bella said, flat-toned. Mike’s inconvenient presence annoyed her. She felt that Edward and she were on the precipice of connecting on some deeper level, whatever level that might be. But as she glanced at Edward, she noticed his eyes on Mike. And he wasn’t thrilled.

Mike’s obliviousness kept him from registering Edward’s hard glare as he made his way towards Bella. Bella made no move to rise and greet him. Instead, she looked across the harbor before making introductions.

“Edward, this is Mike Newton. Mike, this is Edward Cullen. He’s staying here for a bit.”

Mike quickly balanced a covered plate on one hand, extending the other towards Edward. Edward paused before slowly letting his hand meet Mike’s in a strong handshake.

“It’s nice to meet you, Edward,” Mike winced, trying to control the show of discomfort on his face as Edward’s hand gripped his firmly.

Edward grinned and released him, and caught Bella’s widened eyes. She knew what he was doing. And when she rolled her eyes, shaking her head and smiling, he knew she’d caught him in the midst of a pissing contest. He felt ashamed. He’d never been that possessive of a woman. But this was Bella, and the space she had taken up in his heart and mind, unbeknownst to her, was enough for him to feel like he could stake a claim on her. It was wrong, and he knew it, but he couldn’t control it.

“Likewise,” Edward responded as he pretended to go back to his work.

“So here are the muffins, Bella. My mom wanted to let you know there was more where that came from if you needed me to come by again.” The way Mike said that made Bella’s stomach churn, and not in a pleasant way. But her grandmother had taught her to be polite at all costs, so she endured the onslaught with patience, hoping to shoo him away as quickly as possible.

“Thanks Mike. Let me show you where to leave them. Follow me,” she said, looking over her shoulder momentarily only to catch Edward looking at her retreating form, his eyes right above the edge of the laptop screen.

After Bella had successfully managed to herd Mike away from Edward and into the kitchen, she noticed Mike leaning against the kitchen counter, smiling flirtatiously. But it just looked ridiculous on him. She knew what was coming.

“So. Bella. I’m in town permanently now.”

“Yes, your mother told me.”

“Ah,” he replied, his eyes raking up and down her body. She felt dirty.

“Well, what do you say I treat you to nice dinner this weekend in town? I’ll even go out of my way and pick you up.” He looked rather pleased with himself. Bella cringed.

“Oh, Mike, that sounds... yeah, um... I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

“Why not? I hear you haven’t had much luck in the dating department. I could break your dry spell.” 

Was this guy for real? Bella didn’t even know what to say to that, but before she could come up with a response, she heard the French doors to the patio open and close, and the echo of strong, assured footsteps coming towards the kitchen. Edward.

“Bella, hey, I’m just gonna head upstairs and take a shower. Just knock on my door if you need me... for anything.” Edward couldn’t believe he just said that out loud.

Neither could Bella.

“Oh, um...sure, okay, Edward. Enjoy.” They looked at each other, stunned at their words, before Bella’s face broke out in a smirk of her own, trying desperately to conceal the fit of hysterical giggles itching to come out. Edward noticed her efforts and also grinned, his eyes crinkling before he turned and disappeared up the stairs, taking them two-by-two.

“Um. Edward seems, interesting.” Mike once again interjected, ruining yet another moment between the two.

Bella reluctantly turned towards her unwelcome guest. “Yes. Yes he is.”

Mike stood silently, his brows furrowed in confusion. What was up with Bella and her guest, he asked himself. It seemed to him like there was a lot more to it than what they were letting on. But he wasn’t going to let that get in his way. 

“So. Bella. Dinner? Come on. I’ll show you a good time,” Mike asked again with a cocky air.

“No, Mike, I’m sorry. I’m not interested. You and I...” She tried to let him down easily, “You and I wouldn’t work. I’m sure you’ll find a nice girl soon. I hear they just hired a bunch of cute Russian girls on work visas down at the Resort. I’m sure they’d be pretty impressed at your successful business and your good looks.” That last sentence took her some effort to voice. And she cringed internally when it left her lips.

Mike seemed placated and actually nodded in agreement.

“Yeah, I guess you’re right. But Bella, you’ll always be first in line with me. Just knock on my door.” 

Bella tried not to gag, and politely ushered him out of her house. But before she could gather her wits about what had just happened with Edward, the rest of the gang plowed through the house. Alice and Rosie were deep in happy conversation as Jasper trailed behind them, bags of groceries in hand.

“Hey! We got everything. I think we cleaned Mrs. Newton out of all the hot dogs, hamburgers and buns,” Rosie said, setting bags down on the counter. She breathed heavily from the exertion. 

Alice chimed in. “We also stopped by the liquor store and cleaned them out of beer and a great Pinot from some Washington winery. It’s a party tonight!” She danced around the kitchen island into Jasper’s arms. He chuckled at his bride’s antics.

“These two are a force to be reckoned with, Bella. I fear they’ll be like conjoined twins by the end of our vacation,” Jasper mused happily. Bella giggled and made herself useful, putting groceries away and setting out what would be needed for tonight.

After everything was settled for tonight’s festivities, Bella went outside to the patio where Edward and she had quietly contemplated the scene before them. She decided to move the chairs towards the fire pit before she noticed Edward’s cell phone on his vacated seat.

Her wheels started churning, and a new bold resolve took over. She picked up the phone and made her way towards his room. She stood outside of it, contemplating what she was about to do.

Am I about to take Edward up on his offer? She thought.

He did say to knock on his door if she needed anything. She needed to give him back his phone. That was a good enough reason. She second-guessed herself and almost pivoted back to her room. She stopped herself, however, taking a chance and accepting Edward’s challenge. She knew he probably just said it to save her from Mike, but she couldn’t help but she wondered if that was the real reason. Was Edward actually flirting with her earlier? Did he think her beautiful?

She took a cleansing breath. Only one way to find out. She leaned her ear towards his door and heard no sound from the shower. Was he sleeping? Damn it. What if I wake him up?

No. She was going to do it. She knocked hesitantly. 

A few excruciating seconds passed before she heard his footsteps come to the door. When it opened, she nearly fell apart.

Edward had just cracked the door open slightly, his head and bare shoulder and arm the only parts visible. His hair was dark, wet from his shower. His upper body and forearm was incredibly toned and muscular, but not in an exaggerated way. He was incredible.

“Hi.” It’s all she could say, as he always made her speechless. 

And then something miraculous happened. He opened the door wider.

Edward looked at her outside his door. She swallowed roughly, her eyes like a deer in headlights. He noticed as she took stock of him hungrily, probably not realizing that she was doing.

Edward had heard the knocking just as he was exiting his bathroom. Quickly tying a towel around his waist, he had a feeling it was Bella. Any other person, he would’ve only poked his head out. But something in him... the playful, flirtatious part of him, let her see him in his current state of undress.

She rewarded him with a red hot blush that crept up her neck and cheeks.

“Hey. Sorry I didn’t hear you. I hope you weren’t waiting long. What’s up?” Edward asked.

“I... I... um... your phone... I... I mean, I found your phone on the chair outside... here.”

Bella was so beside herself, all she could do was shut her mouth to stop any more word vomit from leaving her mouth. She simply held the phone out to him.

He smiled and took the phone from her with the hand that wasn’t holding his towel together. She tried to look away, but her eyes were traitors. She glanced down to wear the towel rested just below his hips. She could see the light trail of hair leading down and disappearing behind the covering, His V basically telling her eyes to continue southbound. 

“Thanks. I didn’t even realize I didn’t have it with me,” he said with a smile. He couldn’t get over her reaction.

“No problem at all. I’ll just...” her thumbs pointed in the direction of the stairs, “I’ll see you hopefully tonight? You’re joining us, right?” She mentally chastised herself for sounding so hopeless. 

“Yeah, I’ll be there. I wouldn’t miss it.” He locked eyes with her before she turned to go. He watched her leave before closing his door and dressing for the evening.

If what just happened was any indication, Edward thought, he’d make another move towards helping her remember him tonight. Something was happening between them, something he didn’t really expect. There were feelings bubbling up to the surface.

He so desperately needed her acknowledgement that his memories weren’t made up. That they actually happened. That he’d met her that night. That she had actually shaped him into the man he was today without her knowledge. 

He’d find out if she was feeling the same things about him that he so clearly felt for her. He looked over at the envelope on his desk-- the envelope that held her past and future. Next to it, on his laptop, her face emanated peace and promise.

Things were about to get a little more complicated.

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